Skip to main content

really with the shit

 7:59AM    

    for the first time on this blog, I'm just pouring out thoughts. I've used this blog recently actually only as a check in for my artistry. I've come to realize I have a tough time trying to put my emotions into words in conversation. writing has always been a release, and im tryna find that this AM.


first off, I just felt a degree of hopelessness this am as soon as I woke up. I cried in front of a friend yesterday and they stormed out when I couldn't encapsulate how I was feeling. homie didn't help when he left and said something about talking to someone since I wouldn't to him *door closes*


idk bout y'all but that shit didn't fucking help. I went to the gym yesterday after that and got a good leg day in, but came home and depression slept from 4pm till: well, now. 

I felt a bit manic the days before yesterday, not for any particular reason, just gratuitous amounts of energy and a lil bit of them fast thoughts feel me. I wouldn't call it racing thoughts but, def some manicness to my aura; anyway the whip of bi polar cracked, and I found myself depressed and here we are trying to figure out why lol 


I'll tell you what, the reflective process alone already has helped immensely with my mood any energy

I still couldn't really tell you why I was feeling off yesterday, but I will say the gym has been helping as well.

lol well, call me bp but after these however many sentences, im ready to go workout so, 


I'll talk to yinz soon


- David 



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

monday, again.

 10:29AM     Since I've lasted posted, things have been moving. As I type this, I'm sipping coffee at a diner in Marietta, waiting on a steak breakfast that I just ordered. The last time I posted it was before the Holiday that just passed. The holiday treated me well, I saw friends and played a ton of disc golf. Yesterday I played 49 holes.      Still searching for a job. I am at a loss for words on what to do in terms of the job agency and the job they offered me. It's been about a month and they still haven't made a decision, or found a job for me. It's hard to stay in my "mode" of feeling good and working towards my goals, when no one else believes in you, your work  ethic, and what you can do for them.      My mother's birthday is tomorrow. I will admit, there were times in my mental health spat, this day would pass and I would remember weeks later that her birthday was already on a past date. I'm happy I'm finally, FINALLY, feeling ...

humble beginnings

10:02 PM     I've decided to finally start a blog,  specifically involving my life as an artist. On the surface, this is a daunting task to me. I'm hoping that this will be a great outlet, a way to measure and record progress, and an accountability constraint. It is my aim to become more  efficient and effective with my time within the realm of my music and content revolving around the sound.      For those who haven't been around, or I haven't caught up on my life- I moved back to Ohio on the 22nd of May, and it has so revitalizing to my soul.  In the PNW, I felt like I was constantly "wearing a mask" or changing myself like a chameleon to better suit the environment. When I came back to the Ohio valley, I immediately knew this place is what had been missing from my life. This is the  place where I didn't have to change who I was to fit in. This is the place where I standout for eximplary reasons. This is the place I call home.    ...

settlin'

 9:03 PM 07/20/24     Well, since I last posted, A LOT has happened in my life. It's time for a quick recap.  8:40 AM 07/21/24     UPDATE: I passed out so hard last night. Now, I will recap all the "changes" happening in my life.      We moved from one AirBNB to the next for about a week or less, then moved into our new house in Vienna, WV.       I didn't get any of the jobs I applied for. Which might be a good thing. I have been throwing together an idea for a business and with the inheritance check I received yesterday from my grandmother's  estate, this could become a definite reality. I still need to find something during the daytime hours and leave my weekends free to make this side hustle a full time job.      I've played a lot of disc golf, and have spent a lot of time outdoors. My hair is getting more blonde, my skin is becoming tanned, and people tell me I look healthy. I feel healthier but am ...